So how did I get myself into this? Eighteen days of driving across this great big country of ours, starting in New York City and ending up in San Diego. Maybe it was the only way I could get my family to visit my hometown, Indianapolis, by padding it out with treats like five baseball games (Cincinnati Reds, St. Louis Cardinals, Kansas City Royals, Colorado Rockies, Arizona Diamondbacks) and a stop at the Grand Canyon. Which of course means jiggering the whole schedule to match up with home games, and finding hotels near the stadium in every one of these cities, and adding side trips to small towns we'd never otherwise see (because when are we likely to be in Nebraska again?).
Remember that old commercial "See the USA in a Chevrolet"? That's what we're doing, except we'll be seeing the USA in a Dodge Caravan, which is probably the next best thing to a covered wagon. Three teenagers fighting over the shotgun seat, and arguing about whose iPod we plug into the sound system. I may regret not opting for the DVD players -- but wasn't the whole point of this trip for us to actually talk to each other?
Shoot me now.